Every young man and woman dream is to settle down and build a family with their other half. But in a world with over 7 billion people, it is hard making a choice and even when they do, how do they know for sure that they made the right choice.
The numbers of Divorce in America and other European countries are hitting the sky and Africa and Nigeria to be precise is following suit. This statistics is disturbing to the unmarried as they don’t want to walk into a marriage doomed to fail.
Written here are questions people planning to get married should endeavour to answer truthfully before saying I do. Although only God can assure a healthy marriage but answering these question will help intending couple to avoid future breakup.1; DO I LOVE HIM/HER AND DOES HE/SHE LOVE ME?
In marriage, friction, arguments, misunderstanding, quarrels and fights may occur. But it is love that will be the lubricant that will ensure that the wheels of the marriage continue to move smoothly. Love can heal and resolve conflict without resulting to breakup. You can assess whether the other person loves you or not by his/her attitude and disposition towards you. Does he/she care about my well-being? Does he/she bother o check on me when am out of touch? If you are ill does the person put you first? This and many question should help one determine the love level of his/her intended partner.
2; IS HE/SHE TRUTHFUL AND FAITHFUL?
Faithfulness in relationship is not only about cheating. If you marry a liar or an unfaithful person, there will be a breakdown of trust and you will find it hard to live with such person. You can know this by observing him/her. Does he/she hide things from you? Does he/she say one thing today and another the next day? Does he/she keep to appointment? Does he/she claims to be somewhere and instead you meet or see him/her elsewhere?
3; WILL I STILL LOVE HIM/HER IF HIS/HER PRESENT STATUS CHANGES?
Marriage because of monetary, societal or political position is equivalent to auctioning yourself to the highest bidder. If you sell yourself, then be ready to live the rest of your life as a slave. You will have no say nor partake in any decision in the house. Your spouse will have no respect for you nor will his/her family member respect you. Money is important but should not be the determinant factor in choosing who to marry.
4. CAN I LIVE WITH HIS/HER DIRTY PAST?
A lot of people have dirty past like armed robbery, drug dealing, courier or baron; raping, molesting or abortion, incest etc. Ask yourself, will I be able to stand it? Will you be able to stand the shame attached if it was something that is or may be publicly known? You have to l to be real to yourself on this.
5. WILL THE UNION GIVE ME JOY?
Marriage is supposed to be for life. Thus, you have to take proper steps that will give you joy in the marriage. Joy unlike happiness is not caused by external factor rather it comes from within. There are many things that have to be right for joy to come. For example, if you are marrying someone who is much older than you, will you be able to cope with the age gap? If your intending spouse is in a profession that will take him/her away frequently, will you be able to cope with the absence without feeling lonely? Are you sure you that you will not use that as an excuse to then cheat on him/her. Does he/she understand you? Or is his/her way of thinking archaic to you?
6. CAN YOU PROUDLY INTRODUCE EACH OTHER IN THE PUBLIC?
When you get married, you will go a lot of places as a couple and you will be seen together. Will you be ashamed to be seen with him/her? Can you introduce him/her to your friends, colleagues and family?
To be continued…..